4 First Date Mistakes You Should Avoid Let’s face it: dating may be difficult! Despite the fact that internet dating has become the standard, going out of your comfort zone and meeting someone for the first time isn’t always simple.
First dates can be emotional roller coasters, and it’s easy to get lost in your thoughts, going over every imaginable pre-date detail, such as what to dress, what to say, and how to act.
Furthermore, even if you’ve known this person for a while, first dates may be surprising and, as a consequence, quite nerve-racking (no matter your personality type).
Despite the uncertainty and emotions that accompany first dates, dating is the ideal method to meet your potential spouse and create interpersonal bonds.
So, discovering strategies to reduce tension and improve “the art of dating” may help you gain confidence as you begin on this path.
Though some individuals may prefer to remember a list of tips and tactics to follow, understanding what not to do may be more valuable in cultivating an enjoyable and healthy first-date environment.
After all, information is power, and understanding how to keep oneself comfortable and safe is critical.
Do you want to learn more? Here are the top four mistakes to know and avoid on first dates, according to Wale Okerayi LMHC LPC, a professional mental health counselor.
4 First Date Mistakes You Should Avoid
Being Unaware of Your Dating Plans
Whether you’re casually dating or seeking a serious relationship, understanding your own unique dating goals will help you have a fruitful first date.
“It’s vital to know what you’re looking for before dating so you can keep an eye out for things that don’t align,” Okerayi says
If your date is seeking anything serious and you aren’t, it might indicate that you’re not compatible at that moment. And the other way around.
Dating requires a joint effort from both sides, so be honest with yourself (and your partner) about where you are in the dating process.
Meeting Someone Who does not make you happy
Okerayi emphasizes that “catching up with them may not be that pleasurable” if your date has been extremely sexual or has already exceeded limits.
Consider this: First dates are typically loaded with anxieties, so going out with someone who has already made you feel apprehensive and unhappy is not in your best interests.
Trust your instincts and be aware of whether events make you feel secure or uncomfortable.
Looking for the Negatives
Okerayi doesn’t mean being attentive about prospective catastrophes, but rather that “if you are always seeking for something wrong with them, you’ll discover it and not be present on the date at all.” Avoid the urge to scrutinize everything they say or wear.
Dating demands you to be open to meeting new people, and just because something isn’t “right” in your eyes doesn’t imply it’s usually wrong and a major red sign.
Putting them off right away.
According to Okerayi, before concluding that someone isn’t appropriate for you, consider being open to a second date before reaching any decision.
“I believe that getting to know someone on a single date is difficult (of course, excluding if they make you feel uncomfortable or are harmful to you).
Before making any conclusions, I would give it at least two dates” She explains.
Many of us are guilty of dismissing someone based on a quick chat, yet getting to know someone requires communicating with them several times.
If your first date was a letdown, consider going on a second date to see if anything ignites your interest. If not, you have at least tried.
