HomeLove IssuesI'm Still a Virgin Two Months After Our Marriage

I’m Still a Virgin Two Months After Our Marriage


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When I heard about the lady who claimed that her boyfriend’s joystick was too big for her, I became terrified. I’m in a similar scenario, but I’m not sure if it’s my fault or my husband’s. This is the situation I’m in.

My boyfriend and I dated for six years but never became able to have sex. He wanted to do it, but I wouldn’t let him. When I accepted his proposal, that was one of my ground rules. “I come from a Christian family.”

My parents have often told me that having sex before marriage is the same as eating the forbidden fruit. Therefore I’m going to wait until marriage to do it the way God intended,” I told him.

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He mentioned that he had spent years exploring his sexuality with a variety of women in the past. He would, however, wait until marriage to do it with me.

I was glad to have met someone who would not put any pressure on me to break my rules. Because the kind of discourse my parents gave us stayed with me.

“It is a horrible thing for a man who has not married you to touch you,” they would warn us every morning and evening. As a result, I was terrified of what would happen if I defied them.

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For over a year, my husband, who was then my boyfriend, followed my rule. After a year, he began to complain about his pain.

He would try to make moves whenever I was alone with him. I would disagree. “Please let me do just one,” he’d beg. I knew he wouldn’t stop after tasting it, so I clung to my virtue with all my might.

I recall seeing him during his youth service and having to spend a few days with him. He applied a lot of pressure on me, so I let him kiss me.

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But when he tried to fall, I pushed him away. He pleaded with all his strength. He just wanted to do it once that night, but I said no.

I was terrified my parents would find out and be disappointed in me if I did it. What was even worse was the prospect of an unwanted pregnancy.

Oh no! If it happened, I couldn’t face my family. Above all, I wondered how God would react if I cheated. As he came pleading, these thoughts helped me stand my ground.

We were on it until we started planning our wedding. We were both happy that we would finally have each other.

The happiest moment for me that day, I feel, was when my father handed me over to my spouse. Lord gifted us with the ability to have great children.

And all I could think about was having sex with my hubby without worrying about disappointing my parents.

We were exhausted by the end of the ceremony. We couldn’t get to our house, so we spent the night with his parents.

I prepared myself in the same way as a bride prepares for her groom on her wedding night. When it was finally time for us to get to work, he shook his head.

“I’ve been waiting for this for so long, but I’m not going to do it in my parents’ house,” he explained. It’s not the correct setting. Let’s just wait till we go home.” That surprised me, but I accepted it in good faith.

I had to return to work the next day because I still had two weeks before I could officially retire and relocate to his apartment.

He also returned to his home the following day. We started discussing shuperu on my route to handle my business.

He told me exactly what he planned to do to me. I was also looking forward to finally getting close to him.

I conducted some studies on sexual positions so that I could experiment with him. For two weeks, we talked about our fantasies and wants every day.

Afterwards, I packed everything and went to his house. We were both thrilled to see each other and to begin practising what we had talked about over the phone. I was embarrassed to undress in his company, but he forced me to.

That night, we tried everything, but he couldn’t break my hymen. Each of his attempts resulted in my grunting in pain. Even his finger couldn’t get inside of me.

I began to suspect that something was seriously wrong with me, which terrified me. He told me, though, that things would be difficult because it was my first time.

The next day, I called an acquaintance who had also married a virgin. She also assured me that nothing was wrong with me and suggested that we acquire some lubrication. I informed my husband about it, and the two of us went in search of the lubricant my friend advised.

I was nervous to try again after we got home, but I fought it. We had to start over, yet it was still painful. He instructed me to start with my own finger.

When I tried it, I felt a stinging pain that went inside. After it entered, we agreed that I may use his finger as well.

I attempted and succeeded. Because his finger is larger than mine, the agony was excruciating. His joystick was the next item we tried. That one couldn’t even go inside.

I would yell till he stopped every time we attempted it. He also stated that he was in a lot of discomfort. As a result, I urged that we seek medical attention. All I had hoped for was not to be. I even began to say that shuperu is overrated. “That isn’t overrated.” “You’ll appreciate it after we get through the barrier,” he guaranteed.

We went to see a family doctor jointly. He stated that because I have a thick hymen, we should do it in a very relaxed setting and with a lot of foreplay before any penetration.

My husband booked a hotel room for us immediately after our conversation with the doctor. We tried to do everything the doctor advised, but we didn’t go very far the first night.

Regrettably, he received a call from work asking him to return the following day. He had a three-week trip planned. This enraged him, but he had no choice but to leave.

He begged me to use my finger every day before he went so that it would be easy for him when he returned. Every morning, I went online to look up how to disvirgin a woman without causing her agony.

I put practically everything I learnt there into practice, including touching myself every morning. I did a lot of exercises before my hubby returned. I thought I was prepared.

When he returned home, we resumed our war. We tried practically every night, but he couldn’t get any further than the hotel.

I attempted to push him further, but it was simply too painful. My hubby is not pleased with the situation. He stated that causing me pain bothers him.

Every day, I think about it. I keep wondering why it is so difficult for him to break through. Is my husband’s joystick very large? I’m not aware of any other sizes, so I can’t say.

Or am I the one who is undersized? I’m not sure what the issue is. We are still fighting it as I write my story.

I’m hoping someone can tell us what else we can do differently to finally achieve our breakthrough. We’ve been married for two months but have yet to consummate our marriage. Kindly assist us.


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